things that make me want to punch you in the face

adding me to your “buywhatevercrapyouareselling group” on Facebook

irresponsibility

trump

hitch balls

cutting me off in traffic

playing dumb

stealing

stupidity

stubbing my toe on something you left lying around

bros

self righteousness

having a full window/car display of an american flag and/or eagle with american flag, etc.

taking my stuff

checking that “also send email to your circles” box in google plus for your stupid shit. ESPECIALLY when i don’t know you

not caring about others around you

lying

not thinking about others around you

slowly jaywalking while cars are coming

sending a million messages / emails / invites / dms (etc) about yourself or your stupid blog

hurting my friends

cheating

denying climate change

cutting in front of me in line

laziness (i mean, like, all the time)

using the “15 items or less” checkout lanes in the grocery store when you have way more than 15 items

being a douchebag

unnecessary group facebook messages

Using reply-to-all to tell people to stop using reply-to-all

being rude

adding me to that same group MULTIPLE times after i leave the group

telemarketing calls

not listening

tYPe lIk3 DiS..

leaving broken glass and litter around a public park

having any sort of bumper sticker with “learn english you’re in america” or similar ignorant statements

having one of those calvin peeing on something decals on your car

those auto generated horoscope tweets

homophobia

asking me to put a QR code on your website

sending emails filled with “u” “ur” “lol” “def” “lmao” etc.

using IE6 (or IE8)

punchintheface

.

punching me in the face

not taking responsibility for your actions

littering

not following through with things you commit to

driving in a lane that you know will close, because you can see all the signs that everyone else seems to be obeying

putting QR codes on your website

bluetooth douche bags

pretending to listen, but instead you’re really just listening for when the other person is done talking so you can reiterate your side of the argument

racism

#completely #misusing #hashtags #by #typing #like #this #in #Instagram

calling yourself a “social media expert”

putting your stupid baby as your profile picture on social media. all. the. time.

disrespecting others

auto DM’s