things that make me want to punch you in the face

calling yourself a “social media expert”

stupidity

punchintheface

.

playing dumb

slowly jaywalking while cars are coming

putting your stupid baby as your profile picture on social media. all. the. time.

sending a million messages / emails / invites / dms (etc) about yourself or your stupid blog

#completely #misusing #hashtags #by #typing #like #this #in #Instagram

lying

checking that “also send email to your circles” box in google plus for your stupid shit. ESPECIALLY when i don’t know you

adding me to your “buywhatevercrapyouareselling group” on Facebook

homophobia

telemarketing calls

asking me to put a QR code on your website

trump

taking my stuff

having a full window/car display of an american flag and/or eagle with american flag, etc.

putting QR codes on your website

laziness (i mean, like, all the time)

Using reply-to-all to tell people to stop using reply-to-all

leaving broken glass and litter around a public park

littering

not caring about others around you

being rude

irresponsibility

driving in a lane that you know will close, because you can see all the signs that everyone else seems to be obeying

hitch balls

having any sort of bumper sticker with “learn english you’re in america” or similar ignorant statements

not following through with things you commit to

not thinking about others around you

stealing

bros

cutting in front of me in line

denying climate change

adding me to that same group MULTIPLE times after i leave the group

having one of those calvin peeing on something decals on your car

self righteousness

using the “15 items or less” checkout lanes in the grocery store when you have way more than 15 items

cheating

pretending to listen, but instead you’re really just listening for when the other person is done talking so you can reiterate your side of the argument

auto DM’s

disrespecting others

those auto generated horoscope tweets

not taking responsibility for your actions

punching me in the face

sending emails filled with “u” “ur” “lol” “def” “lmao” etc.

hurting my friends

unnecessary group facebook messages

not listening

using IE6 (or IE8)

bluetooth douche bags

cutting me off in traffic

being a douchebag

stubbing my toe on something you left lying around

racism

tYPe lIk3 DiS..