things that make me want to punch you in the face

driving in a lane that you know will close, because you can see all the signs that everyone else seems to be obeying

not caring about others around you

having one of those calvin peeing on something decals on your car

leaving broken glass and litter around a public park

telemarketing calls

taking my stuff


adding me to your “buywhatevercrapyouareselling group” on Facebook

#completely #misusing #hashtags #by #typing #like #this #in #Instagram

calling yourself a “social media expert”

not following through with things you commit to

bluetooth douche bags

unnecessary group facebook messages

hurting my friends

not taking responsibility for your actions

sending a million messages / emails / invites / dms (etc) about yourself or your stupid blog


asking me to put a QR code on your website


not thinking about others around you


checking that “also send email to your circles” box in google plus for your stupid shit. ESPECIALLY when i don’t know you

tYPe lIk3 DiS..

adding me to that same group MULTIPLE times after i leave the group

not listening

using IE6 (or IE8)

cutting in front of me in line





having a full window/car display of an american flag and/or eagle with american flag, etc.

laziness (i mean, like, all the time)

stubbing my toe on something you left lying around

denying climate change

slowly jaywalking while cars are coming

being rude

being a douchebag



cutting me off in traffic

pretending to listen, but instead you’re really just listening for when the other person is done talking so you can reiterate your side of the argument

Using reply-to-all to tell people to stop using reply-to-all

playing dumb

those auto generated horoscope tweets

putting your stupid baby as your profile picture on social media. all. the. time.

using the “15 items or less” checkout lanes in the grocery store when you have way more than 15 items

punching me in the face

sending emails filled with “u” “ur” “lol” “def” “lmao” etc.

auto DM’s

putting QR codes on your website

hitch balls

disrespecting others


having any sort of bumper sticker with “learn english you’re in america” or similar ignorant statements

self righteousness