things that make me want to punch you in the face

not taking responsibility for your actions

self righteousness

having any sort of bumper sticker with “learn english you’re in america” or similar ignorant statements

slowly jaywalking while cars are coming

being rude

not thinking about others around you

not listening

adding me to your “buywhatevercrapyouareselling group” on Facebook

Using reply-to-all to tell people to stop using reply-to-all

#completely #misusing #hashtags #by #typing #like #this #in #Instagram

having one of those calvin peeing on something decals on your car

driving in a lane that you know will close, because you can see all the signs that everyone else seems to be obeying


unnecessary group facebook messages

bluetooth douche bags




being a douchebag

cutting me off in traffic


sending emails filled with “u” “ur” “lol” “def” “lmao” etc.

tYPe lIk3 DiS..

hurting my friends

adding me to that same group MULTIPLE times after i leave the group

pretending to listen, but instead you’re really just listening for when the other person is done talking so you can reiterate your side of the argument

putting your stupid baby as your profile picture on social media. all. the. time.

taking my stuff

punching me in the face

not following through with things you commit to

not caring about others around you

using IE6 (or IE8)


telemarketing calls

denying climate change

cutting in front of me in line

using the “15 items or less” checkout lanes in the grocery store when you have way more than 15 items

sending a million messages / emails / invites / dms (etc) about yourself or your stupid blog

hitch balls

those auto generated horoscope tweets

auto DM’s

disrespecting others

asking me to put a QR code on your website



calling yourself a “social media expert”


leaving broken glass and litter around a public park


stubbing my toe on something you left lying around

putting QR codes on your website

laziness (i mean, like, all the time)

having a full window/car display of an american flag and/or eagle with american flag, etc.


playing dumb

checking that “also send email to your circles” box in google plus for your stupid shit. ESPECIALLY when i don’t know you