things that make me want to punch you in the face

putting your stupid baby as your profile picture on social media. all. the. time.

having any sort of bumper sticker with “learn english you’re in america” or similar ignorant statements

tYPe lIk3 DiS..

driving in a lane that you know will close, because you can see all the signs that everyone else seems to be obeying

sending a million messages / emails / invites / dms (etc) about yourself or your stupid blog


not caring about others around you

not listening

slowly jaywalking while cars are coming

not taking responsibility for your actions

calling yourself a “social media expert”

not following through with things you commit to

auto DM’s

denying climate change

stubbing my toe on something you left lying around

putting QR codes on your website



self righteousness

using IE6 (or IE8)

adding me to that same group MULTIPLE times after i leave the group

being a douchebag

those auto generated horoscope tweets


being rude

having a full window/car display of an american flag and/or eagle with american flag, etc.

punching me in the face


telemarketing calls


using the “15 items or less” checkout lanes in the grocery store when you have way more than 15 items

checking that “also send email to your circles” box in google plus for your stupid shit. ESPECIALLY when i don’t know you

disrespecting others


cutting me off in traffic


sending emails filled with “u” “ur” “lol” “def” “lmao” etc.

taking my stuff

bluetooth douche bags

having one of those calvin peeing on something decals on your car

#completely #misusing #hashtags #by #typing #like #this #in #Instagram

asking me to put a QR code on your website

laziness (i mean, like, all the time)

not thinking about others around you

Using reply-to-all to tell people to stop using reply-to-all

pretending to listen, but instead you’re really just listening for when the other person is done talking so you can reiterate your side of the argument


cutting in front of me in line

unnecessary group facebook messages


hitch balls


adding me to your “buywhatevercrapyouareselling group” on Facebook

leaving broken glass and litter around a public park

playing dumb


hurting my friends