things that make me want to punch you in the face



auto DM’s

sending a million messages / emails / invites / dms (etc) about yourself or your stupid blog

tYPe lIk3 DiS..


#completely #misusing #hashtags #by #typing #like #this #in #Instagram

having a full window/car display of an american flag and/or eagle with american flag, etc.

laziness (i mean, like, all the time)

denying climate change

sending emails filled with “u” “ur” “lol” “def” “lmao” etc.

cutting me off in traffic

punching me in the face

being a douchebag

driving in a lane that you know will close, because you can see all the signs that everyone else seems to be obeying

having any sort of bumper sticker with “learn english you’re in america” or similar ignorant statements

those auto generated horoscope tweets

leaving broken glass and litter around a public park

not taking responsibility for your actions

putting QR codes on your website

not listening


stubbing my toe on something you left lying around

playing dumb


having one of those calvin peeing on something decals on your car



not caring about others around you

putting your stupid baby as your profile picture on social media. all. the. time.

self righteousness

unnecessary group facebook messages


cutting in front of me in line

using IE6 (or IE8)

checking that “also send email to your circles” box in google plus for your stupid shit. ESPECIALLY when i don’t know you

slowly jaywalking while cars are coming

Using reply-to-all to tell people to stop using reply-to-all

asking me to put a QR code on your website

using the “15 items or less” checkout lanes in the grocery store when you have way more than 15 items


hurting my friends

adding me to your “buywhatevercrapyouareselling group” on Facebook

adding me to that same group MULTIPLE times after i leave the group

disrespecting others

pretending to listen, but instead you’re really just listening for when the other person is done talking so you can reiterate your side of the argument

hitch balls

bluetooth douche bags

not following through with things you commit to


telemarketing calls

calling yourself a “social media expert”

not thinking about others around you

taking my stuff

being rude